Well. I'm painting.
I wish I could share in great detail what this year has been for me, personally, as well as for my family. God has us all on a journey & He has reminded me of that in great detail this year in particular.
He sat me down in 1 Corinthians for a good long time.....& it is changing me from the inside out. We had a couple of deaths in our family this year & at one of those funerals they read from 1 Corinthians 13.
The love verses.
Which you usually hear at weddings.
Not funerals.
And the words stung.

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.

I grieve over those words.
Knowing that I had not loved her well.
So convicted. So guilty & rightly convicted of being nothing more than a clanging cymbal.

And so I painted.
Like a mad & crazy woman I painted & couldn't stop.
I cried & shoo-ed the husband & the children while I processed all of this hurt inside of me.
And all I could paint was 1 Corinthians 13.
Pieces of it here & there. Coming face to face with my guilt & pain & regret.
And then He showed me so clearly the words that come next.

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
Love never ends.

His love is so good. It's a wonder He doesn't strike us all down for the way we represent Him sometimes. Knowing God through the lenses of love changes everything. And I know I'll never be the same after having to deal with the pain of not loving her well....of not painting a better picture of a God who is so full of love & mercy & patience & kindness & hope.

So. It has been a journey. And it will continue to be a journey.
I hope.
If you check out the shop you'll see some hearts.
It's where I am.
Hearts & love & hope & faith & a lotta hearts. I don't think you can have too many hearts. And I'm certain you can't have too much love.
The Neema Shop still has some awesome changes coming her way & I can't wait to keep you posted, but in the meantime, I'll be posting things for sale in the shop as they happen.

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